(To be sung to the tune of ‘Catch a Falling Star’) Catch a falling star, then Put it up your arse holeClench until the pain subsides. Walk up to a stranger,Warn him of the dangerWrithe upon the floorThen die!
Gentle, loving crepe stirs only in the moonlight, never to walk again
“Huzzah!” You say, While traveling on the wind, “To the coast!” You say, as your head is suddenly twinned Left on your own, you tickle the creations of your mind. If you think about it only the weak are resigned. Pleasure is magnificent, like an ocelot with a grin. Just what does it take to […]
Through darkened days This winter haze Makes ones soul feel tired and gruesome But soon spring grows, Defrosts my nose And my rickets start to loosen.
If you live near the woods There is a chance you’ll know A bizarre creature dwells there Known as the “Butler Crow”. He’ll lurk near hippy campers And follow them around Decorate trees with tea cups, And leave cup cakes on the ground. He’ll spend days tracking hikers And turning down their beds Startling them […]
CAITLIN: Caitlin is frightened to sleep She worries she’ll kidnap some sheep So she ties herself down Paints her face like a clown Then she’ll roll in a ball and she’ll weep. AUTUMN: Autumn is usually neat Until she’s taken a seat She’ll grow horns on her face And writhe with disgrace And carve her […]
“Aren’t my stripes lovely?” Said Bumblebee He stretched out his arms And looked at me “All the other creatures Far and near From the crusted toads To the mottled deer… “They must envy this fluff So warm and neat That grows from my head To my dainty feet!” Bumblebee smiled (A most arrogant grin) Pushed […]
It was a crumbly evening I trekked through crumbly snow Scented crumbly singing Twas going with the flow I peered through the milky butter A figure moved with grace Clutching throngs of rusty cats Crumbling beard upon his face I approached with similar caution A crumbly bauble in my hand I waited for a clearer […]
“Excuse me sir!” the young bird said, To the caterpillar on the tree. “I am awfully sorry, but I am in a hurry, And there’s someone expecting me.” “What is it you want?” He replied with a grunt, Whilst munching upon a leaf. “I’m eating my lunch, You’re disturbing my brunch And soon I will […]
One day, on a quiet rigid night, Creeps a quiet frigid postman, With a quiet frigid kite, I broke the frigid silence, By groping frigid pear But then he turned around And returned the frigid stare Then suddenly out of nowhere His thumbs began to quake Shoulders bristled meekly In his muffled, frigid wake His […]